Runaway Devil With A Heart
by sweetcrimefighter
Summary: Let the devil catch you but by a single hair, and you are his forever" Gotthold Ephraim Lessing Isabella Swan moves to Forks, Washington. She is 754 years old, has a dangerous secret and is on the run. Will she find love in the form of a vampire?
1. Chapter 1

**Runaway Devil With A Heart**

**Preface**

As I lay on the cold, marble floor, waiting for my imminent death to come; I felt an odd sensation of joy. Don't get me wrong; I wasn't glad I was dying, I was glad because with my death it would all be over. No one would ever get hurt by me again.

The terror I felt earlier in the face of death had completely vanished, only the contentment remained. My loved ones would be safe from now on; safe from me and my hazardous life. Though they viewed themselves as indestructible, which they were in theory, I viewed them as easily breakable, especially when in my presence.

I should have never entered their lives; I should have left as soon as I had a chance. I was weak and they paid for it. Finally, now I was paying for it. I didn't want to leave them, but I knew I had no choice. Also, it was the right thing, for my once future family.

I closed my eyes, closed myself off from the impending pain; focused on the joy and relief I felt that they would now be safe, and let the fire slowly consume me. I could stop it, I had enough strength left for that, but I didn't do it, I just slowed it down, just long enough to pull his face before my eyes one last time, the face of my one true love in my 754 years of existence, Edward Cullen. The man, well, vampire technically, who changed my entire purpose in life; the man who meant the world to me. The one person I regretted not being able to say goodbye to. The only one I had ever let into my heart; my survival in so many ways.

I saw his face as clearly as could be, and said goodbye to him, even though he couldn't hear it; in my mind, I told him how much I loved him one last time. Then, I shook the image from my thoughts and prepared for death, as I slowly released my hold on the approaching fire.

I was ready.

**Chapter 1: Freedom vs. Peace Of Mind**

**Bella POV**

I sighed as I walked through my newly purchased house on the outskirts of the small town Fork, placed in Washington. It was a beautiful open spaced house with lots of windows, but it didn't appeal to me.

If there was one thing about being imprisoned for 589 years; it was that, when you were finally free, everything seemed dull and tremendous; at least, to me it did. I had thought that once I gained my freedom, I would feel free and embrace it; I didn't. I only felt terror, fear that they'd find me once more and capture me again, or worse, kill me. No, actually, death wouldn't be worse if they found me again; that would be welcoming.

As I pondered over the reasons why my freedom did not appeal to me - not even after all these years - I remembered a quote I once read by Robert A. Heinlein: _'You can have peace. Or you can have freedom. Don't ever count on having both at once.' _It reminded me a little of my situation, I had freedom in the literal sense, but in the emotional sense? Did I have freedom? Peace of mind? That was easy to answer - No. I did not. I was trapped inside my fear; I had no peace at all. I only had freedom. But then, another quote I once read by Malcolm X made me doubt the other one; he had said: _'You can't separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless he has his freedom.'_ So did that mean that I was supposed to feel at peace because I had my freedom? Was something wrong with me because I didn't feel at peace? Who was right? Was it Heinlein or Malcolm? Which one did I agree with?

My head was beginning to hurt from all the thinking, so I stopped. I cleared my mind from all thoughts; it was the closest thing to achieving some sort of feeling of peace I could find. I could still think when I emptied my mind, but not as clearly as I could when all my thoughts were swirling around. It was easier to breathe that way.

After a while, I re-started my thinking process; this time I went back to my original thoughts - my new house in Forks, well, just outside it. Forks was the most secluded town I could find, where it rained more than almost any other town in the USA. It was most likely the last place where they would search for me; they knew how much I hated bad weather. Though I knew it was only a matter of time before they found me; I could only shield myself for so long.

So far, they had found me 3 times over the last 45 years, ever since I escaped. All this time, still I felt no more serene than the first moment I had breathed in the fresh air that came with said freedom. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that I was constantly running. Maybe that's why I could not find some sense of tranquility.

_Damn! Now I was thinking about it again!_ I cleared my mind once more, ignoring the fact that my body was screaming in protest. I was already doing so much at once, that when I used more of my powers, it exhausted me quickly. But I didn't care, not now, I was used to it.

Back to my original thoughts again; Forks. I had enrolled myself in the high school, passing for a 17 year old, which was easy since I was forever stuck in the body of a 17 year old teenage girl. I signed up with my real name; a name I hadn't used since I escaped, in fear they would find me. I had used 29 different names so far, but this time, I felt the sudden need to use my own name. It was possibly the stupidest move I could make; but for once, I wanted to be Isabella Swan again, Bella, to be precise. I wanted to be myself again.

I made up this crack story that my parents, god bless their souls, traveled a lot so they would hardly ever be in town. They wouldn't question it too much, I made sure of that. Having the ability of mind control came in very handy, especially when on the run. It was definitely my most useful power. Not my most powerful, but my most useful. Now, don't mistake my mind control with mind reading, I can't do that. I can only control other people's minds and my own. That's how I was always able to empty my mind, make it blank whenever I wanted. As I said. Useful.

I was scheduled to start my first day of school tomorrow, a Monday. It was the middle of January, so I would be the only new students. Hell, I would probably be the only new student even if it were the beginning of the year. I wouldn't have trouble catching up; I knew more than the whole school combined. It helps when you're able to remember every single thing you're told, or that you read or, well, you get the picture. Bottom line, I remember EVERYTHING. That can come in handy also, but usually sucks because my mind is so full it feels like it'll explode if anything else comes in.

I was a little nervous though, about attending school again. I hadn't done that in over 600 years. The last 45 years, I had mostly wandered around or worked a little from time to time. I didn't have to worry about money, with my powers, money was easily obtained.

So, school. Yeah, I was worried - not that they wouldn't like me, I could always make them like me if I felt the need to do so; no, I was worried that they'd see I was different somehow. That they'd discover who I was; what I was, and get hurt because of that. I didn't look so different from normal humans, but different enough.

I was 5 foot 4 inches, short, but nothing weird about that. I had brown hair, with streaks of red in it - I dyed it 4 years ago. It was a little shinier than a normal people's hair, but in this rainy town, that would hardly stand out. Even if it did stand out, I'd just tell them it's because my shampoo is so shiny or something clever like that, people weren't hard to fool. My skin was pale, not white, but not a normal skin toned color either. It had always been pale, even when I was still normal; it had just gotten a little paler over the centuries. Here's the thing, when my skin didn't get enough sunlight, it almost turned transparent. I did turn transparent, actually, because of being in the dark for so many centuries. But I had spent plenty of time in the sun since I was free, so now I was just pale, not see-through. Then there were my eyes. My eyes, when examined closely, turned color according to my moods. When captivated, it had always been dark, as dark as my emotions. But when I was happy, it was almost as if a fire was shining in my eyes. When I was sad, they turned a weird shade of blue, because apparently sadness made me think of blue. Weird, yes, I told you it was. Mostly I tried to keep my feelings at bay, and focus on being calm, then my eyes were a shade a chocolate brown, the most natural it could be. I didn't want to brag, but I was slightly prettier than your average human, I possessed more grace.

Speaking of possessing more grace, did I tell you I was clumsy as hell? Ridiculous, right?! I dwelled this earth for 754 years, yet, still, I hadn't mastered the ability to stay vertical. I tripped so much it was beyond annoying or embarrassing, it was outright outrageous. So, if that didn't attract unwanted attention to me, I didn't know what would. Oh, maybe the fact that when I blushed, I had to watch out or I would begin glowing like a light bulb. Yeah, freak, that's my name!

I was exasperated; this wasn't how I imagined my life would turn out when I was growing up. I had imagined a fairy tale wedding, kids, growing old with my beloved husband. Instead, I ended up here, in a world and time where almost everyone I grew up with was dead. Almost everyone, sadly, some were as old or older than me. They were monsters! I was just a girl, an ancient girl so be it, but a girl anyway. That's how I viewed myself, that's why I refused to do what they asked me. That's why they entrapped me, why they hated me.

_'Stupid Bella! Stop thinking about them for two freakin' seconds! Will ya?!' _I scolded myself mentally, and nodded to no one than myself.

I walked up to the room I had picked for myself out of 10 room choices - the biggest room with the best view on the too green forest - stepped inside, flung myself on the bed and closed my eyes. I didn't sleep, I only slept once in 50 years, and then I slept for 3 months in a row. Weird, yeah, I said that already. I had had my last 'winter' sleep, as I called it, 6 years ago, so I had some time before the next one.

Once again, I emptied my mind, and didn't think about anything for the remaining hours until the new day would come, and school also. One, who would see me, would think I was asleep, I imagined I seemed rather peaceful. _Ha! If they only knew!_

Peace was nowhere in my vocabulary, as I said before. There was only fear. Now, added to that fear, was the fear of discovery at my new school. If my mind wasn't blank right now, I would have been panicking about what a horrible decision it was to go to school. But, I had already arranged it all now, I wouldn't back out. I wasn't some headless chicken. No, I would just have to see how the next day went, hopefully, well enough.


	2. Chapter 2

**_A/N: I know nothing about motorcycles, I got all my information from the Harley Davidson site. Enjoy your read and please review. Thanks._**

**Chapter 2: Angel I See**

After hours of weariness and nothingness, the time finally came to get ready for school. I was frightened, I was nervous, and somehow, strangely exited. Who knew where this new path would lead me? I would have to be cautious around those fragile humans, as not to hurt them. Let's just say, that when I get too emotional, things could get very heated and it could turn out badly for one of the humans. It had happened before; I'd never killed anyone though - I was grateful for that. But I had seriously injured some humans when I got emotional - so keeping my emotions in check was the most important thing I had to do.

I would also have to mind my speech. I could easily speak like a teenager, but sometimes I would forget and speak like some ancient dead person - not a smart move. But acting like a teenager? That, I hadn't done in forever. Speaking like one was one thing, but how did you act like one? Those were things I forgot to keep in mind while signing up for this, stupid me. So, how did teenagers act these days?

Did they like school? Hate it? Did they love to be educated? Or would they rather stay ignorant? Yet another quote crossed my mind, which happened a lot when I thought about things; it was a quote of someone named Dave Barry. He said something about youth: _'You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.' _So what did that mean? That when you were young you were immature? And even though you're not young anymore, you could still be immature? So, did that mean I would have to act immature around these teenagers? That would prove... problematic. I had never been immature, even while growing up, I was always the mature one. So, how did I become the immature one now? That would be something to think about, later. First, I needed to get dressed and go to school.

I walked to my new closet filled with all sorts of new clothing. I picked out a black, low rise, leather pants, a black tank top and a black leather jacket to wear above it. I finished it of with black leather boots (I was addicted to the color black and leather), without heels, or I would fall for sure. I didn't worry about the cold outside, I never got cold, so no problems in that department. Besides, I heard leather jackets were supposed to be warm, so I doubted anyone would question if I were cold. At least that's what I hoped.

I let my hair hang loose, it suited me best, plus, I didn't feel like doing anything special to it. I put on some light make-up, nothing special. I kept it natural, which, again, suited me best. Also, I didn't want to attract any unnecessary attention toward me. I would be getting too much attention already as it was.

I walked downstairs - for once, I didn't trip - and into the garage. I smiled as I saw my beauty standing in the center; my Night Train Harley Davidson, new 2009 model. It was in a vivid black shade, of course. It had a Rigid-Mounted Twin Cam 96B Engine with black covers and packs a punch with loads of torque (117Nm/86 ft. lbs. at 3200 rpm). A chrome, staggered, shorty exhaust system with dual mufflers. A sleek and black "Horseshoe" oil tank with chrome external oil lines. Also, a sport front fender with color matched brace supports. Color matched? It's always been black for me, baby. A bobtail rear fender with wrinkle-black supports. Oh, and the coolest tires ever! 200mm wide 17" tires, basically a fat and bold tire that provides responsive maneuverability while gripping every mile of every ride. A black nostalgic console, you could say that old-school design meets modern day technology on that one. And I loved my seat! It was a once-piece, two-up bandlander seat. It's aggressively styled with a clean, smooth shape. Really comfortable! Stainless steel, drag handlebars set on a 5-inch straight riser. And last, but not least, a classic, Softail, 5.0-gallon fuel tank.

Cost price for that my beauty which I very fittingly named Baby Vixen? Almost $16.000, of course, I didn't pay a dime. I just manipulated the salesman into giving it to me, then made him think I paid for it and rode of into the sunset. Figure of speech.

No one was more addicted to motorcycles than me; when I first began riding, I crashed 15 bikes in 12 days. That's what you get for trying to ride when you're accident prone. But that was years ago, now, I'm one of the best riders in the world, I would bet. Ever heard of the expression _'Need For Speed' _? Well, that pretty much applies to me, though, I don't know about cars. I had never driven a car in my life, oh well, if I ever got the chance to crash a car, I would grasp it with both hands.

I got on my Baby Vixen, put on my stupid, unwanted, unneeded helmet and departed. I hated wearing a helmet; it looked stupid - alright, on me, it probably looked hot. Still, I didn't like them, they were a tedious obstruction. But, I had to pretend to be human, safe, so I needed to do what humans did. Though, I had noticed that many humans did not wear helmets. They were stupid, they should wear them, if they were to fall, they'd get seriously injured. I'd seen it too many times to keep count.

I loved the feel of the motorcycle under the body, the sweet, spinning purr it dispersed. I loved the brush of the wind against my body. I loved everything about it and my beauty. She was the best -the light of my life- not to be too sentimental or anything.

I parked at the school, next to a shiny, silver Volvo - the only nice looking car in the parking lot; apparently people here preferred junk over beauty - and got of as graciously as I could. I sighed in relief when I stayed erect; I had no desire to fall already. But, I usually never fell when I stepped of my Baby Vixen; that was probably the only time I wasn't such a klutz. I took of my helmet, shaking my hair in the process, and put it on the motorcycle. I didn't care if anyone stole it, I could easily get another. I put a chain around my beauty, she was worth protecting. Though I doubted anyone would steal it here without my knowledge.

I glanced around the school and noticed everyone outside staring at me, unabashed. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, because, well, it could be possible that they rolled a little too much, too far, and they would get acquainted with the back of my eyes - not a pretty sight. I grabbed my black backpack, yes, black! Ruffled through it for a few seconds and grabbed my pair of black, Chanel, diamond covered sunglasses out and put them on. I knew I didn't need them, I just liked wearing them, besides, it was best to protect my eyes as mush as possible.

I now looked toward the building - the dark shades of the glasses didn't affect me, I had very good vision, not perfect night vision, but close to it - and cringed at the sight of it. It looked nothing like a school was supposed to look, in my mind anyway. It looked more like separate buildings than one school. I shrugged the feeling of disappointment off, this would be fun, I told myself.

I looked around for the administrations office and quickly found it. I walked to it, stares of the kids following me as I walked. I had a nice, sexy walk, despite the fact that I could fall down any given moment. I was content about that. Once inside, this woman named Mrs. Cope gave me my schedule, and some slips of paper I needed my teachers to sign and hand back in at the end of the day.

My first class was gym, ughh; I had hoped I wouldn't have to go to that. I would skip it in the future, as much as I could, I told myself. Today I had no choice but to go, he needed to sign my paper. But I already had an idea; I was going to feign cramps due to my 'red flag'. It would work like a charm, I was sure. Okay, not sure, I hoped it, though.

***

I had been right about my gym excuse; it had worked like a charm, thankfully. I was allowed to sit it out and watch as the rest of the group played a game of basketball, nothing I wanted to be involved in. I could only imagine if I got too irritated or embarrassed and send all the balls flying in the air - that would be quite a sight. Oh yeah, had I mentioned I have the power of telekinesis - roughly translated; the ability to move objects with my mind, my second and most powerful ability. I controlled it fairly well, but as I said, when I got too emotional, I sometimes lost control over it. For-instance, I once got really pissed off at this drunken guy and sent him flying across the room into a wall. I didn't kill him, as I mentioned before, I had never killed anyone, ever. I did give him some bruises, a broken shoulder and a concussion, nothing too severe. I liked that power, but I just wished I could control it better sometimes. Enough about that, back to the school day.

I met some nice, some crazy over-joyous and some irritating people. Among the nice category belonged Angela Weber and her boyfriend Ben something, he didn't mention his last name to me. Among the crazy over-joyous category belong Jessica Stanley, that girl had so much pep in her it was a wonder she was able to sit still during an entire class. And among the irritating category belonged Mike Newton, who had apparently taken it upon himself to follow me around like a love-sick puppy dog - that would get pretty annoying really fast.

During my English class - which I absolutely loved - Jessica, who sat next to me and couldn't stop babbling for one freakin' second, invited me to eat lunch with her. I wanted to refuse, I had no desire to listen to her non-stop one-way conversation while I ate, but I accepted - I didn't want to be the weirdo who refused to sit with the 'in' crowd on her first day - because that's what Jessica was; one of the 'in' crowd. I would just have to suck it up; it was only an hour, right? I could stick it out that long, I hoped.

I had third period free; I used that time to walk around school a little, get acquainted with my new surroundings a little. Nothing exiting happened - I did trip twice, but so far, I haven't fallen flat on my face yet, which was very good.

Fourth period was a horror; Math class. Ugh, I hated math - okay, so I was good at it, but that was just because I remembered everything I heard. I just hated numbers and calculations and stuff; it was just too boring for the likes of me. I was thrilled when the signal bell sounded, announcing the lunch period.

When I walked out into the hallway, I was quickly caught up by the Newton boy. I cursed under my breath, why the fuck couldn't he leave me alone? I felt my eyes darken as the irritation and anger toward this stupid, trivial boy surged inside me. I emptied my mind to calm myself, so I wouldn't do anything stupid, but it was hard with this kid talking to me as if I were _his _girl. I was glad when we reached the cafeteria and Jessica - who obviously had some insane crush on this boy - snagged him away to ask him about some assignment she forgot about; I thought that was a rather lame excuse. If you liked someone, then you just tell them, right? Or don't they do that anymore? Ah, I didn't know a thing about love, so who was I to judge how this girl went about it? No one, that's who.

I let my mind fill itself again - pulling the cloud of mist I put over it away - once I was sure that Newton was too busy with the Stanley girl to further aggravate me. I followed them to their lunch table - to where all the 'popular' kids sat - and sat down next to the Weber girl, I liked her. That's when I first felt it; a strange sensation in the pit of my stomach, almost as if some electric surge was running through my veins. It was unlike anything I had ever felt before - it was magical, entrancing. This time, I felt my eyes light up, becoming the flaming fire I was used to experiencing when I was happy. I was happy, but I had no idea why.

I took deep, calm breaths, so I wouldn't suddenly send things flying in the air - that would look suspicious - and then looked around to find the source of the peculiar feeling I was sensing. As I looked at all the faces - some familiar, some new - I found no one that appealed to me; no one I saw so far was the source of my new emotional state. Just when I was about to give up, I saw him.

He was sitting at a table in the far end corner of the cafeteria, away from all the other students. With him, four other people were sitting, couples, it seemed. They were all beautiful, too beautiful, I thought. He was the most enchanting of all with his lanky, not bulky, posture and his strange, bronze colored, disheveled hair. His eyes were a weird shade of gold, topaz I would say. I had never seen eyes like that. As I looked closely, I noticed they all had the same color of eyes, how strange. The ones who I thought were couples were beautiful as well. The couple sitting next to the bronze haired boy seemed to come right out of a movie - they all looked that way, actually. The girl had wavy, long, golden colored hair and had the posture of a model. The guy sitting next to her - who she was holding hands with - was a little scary looking. He was big, muscular, kind of like a boxer or weight-lifter. His hair was curly; a dark shade of black. Next to him there sat another boy, next to another girl. That boy had honey blond hair; he also seemed muscular, but leaner than the big guy. The girl next to him was tiny, pixie-like; she was very thin, her features were small and she had black, spiky hair. She was gazing into the boy's eyes as if he were the only one in the cafeteria at that time.

But my attention was focused on the bronze haired boy, who wasn't eating and staring into space. Come to think of it, they were all doing the same - not eating, and staring into nothingness, or each other's eyes. They seemed so different from anyone in the room. They kind of reminded me of myself - inhuman. Their skin was pale, paler than mine even - it bothered me I hadn't noticed that until now, usually I noticed everything right away. They seemed cold, somehow, not cold in the literal sense, but as if they were ice sculptures instead of people. And their beauty, it bothered me, they were too beautiful. More beautiful than me, it was unnatural. Something was up with them, I knew that from the second I lay eyes on them, and I would figure out what. Not only would I figure that out, but I would also figure out why I felt this way, all because of that strange looking, impossibly handsome, bronze haired boy.

"Hey, Bella, what are you looking at?" Jessica asked with a giggle, snapping me from my thoughts. By the sound of her tone, she already knew who I was looking at; she just wanted to talk to me about it. I felt no need to go into some pointless teenage conversation with her where she did all the talking, so I lied. I used to be a terrible liar, but 7 and a half centuries of practice worked wonders on improving that. "Nothing." I said with a smooth face and a firm tone that suggested I didn't want to talk about it. But apparently she was oblivious to my determination to not talk about it, as she began talking about it herself.

"Yeah right... They're the Cullen's and Hale's," she said to me, as if I had asked her who they were. She looked at them, and she was not the only one, half the table turned to look from them, to me. I had no yearning to talk about them, but I saw Jessica's face, and some of the others'; they would force the information about the Cullen's and Hale's on me anyway. So, after some deliberation with myself, I decided I might as well act like a normal, curious teenager and ask Jessica what their story was.

"What's their deal?" I asked, sounding like any other teenager - I had been concentrating on the teenage lingo all day, and it was going well so far. Jessica looked delighted that I was pressing for more information, but she wasn't the one to answer. Angela Weber, who was sitting in between Jessica and Newton (I refused to even think that repulsive kid's first name, let alone say it out loud), answered my question. "They're doctor and Mrs. Cullen's kids. They're all adopted; the Cullen's are far too young to have children of those ages. Dr. Cullen is in his late twenties or early thirties. Also, Mrs. Cullen can't have kids," Angela said. I didn't have to ask for more information; Jessica continued the story as soon as Angela was done speaking.

"They're all really weird, and all together - like together, together, as couples," Jessica exclaimed as if it were some sort of crime. I failed to see the crime in it, they were adopted, not blood related, so that should prove no problem to anyone, right? "Yeah, but they're not actually blood-related, Jessica," Angela spoke out my own thoughts. Jessica seemed slightly annoyed by Angela's comment, but ignored it.

"What are their names?" I asked, desperately wanting to know the bronze haired boy's name. I had no idea why, but I was attracted to him in some way I couldn't quite figure out just yet. But I would, in time, I would decipher this strange appeal I seemed to have toward him, as well as the reason why he seemed so different that all the other humans I had ever encountered.

"The tiny girl is Alice Cullen, she's really weird. The guy next to her is her boyfriend, Jasper Hale. He's the twin of the model, Rosalie. They're the cousins of Mrs. Cullen or something. I guess their parents died and Mrs. Cullen decided to adopt them as well. The guy next to Rosalie is Emmet Cullen. And then there's Edward Cullen; he's single, but you shouldn't waste your time on him, apparently none of the girls here are good enough for him," Jessica finished her explanation - by the sound of her tone at the end, Edward - the bronze haired one - the beautiful one - the god-like one - had rejected her at one time or another. I felt no sympathy for the girl, if I were a guy, I would refuse her too - her better-than-thou attitude was rather off-putting.

I permitted myself one last glance at the Cullen table before I would empty my mind to relax myself. As I looked over at them, I was entrapped in the mesmerizing topaz eyes of Edward Cullen. He was staring at me intently, a mixture of curiosity, irritation and fear? In his eyes. I wanted to look away, avert his gaze, ashamed that he had caught me staring at him, but I couldn't. I was getting anxious and slightly embarrassed as we continued our eye-fuck, as I called it. I could feel my cheeks flush, reddening, and I knew that if I didn't get out of here fast, I would be glowing like a red light bulb in a matter of seconds.

Finally, I forced myself to look away from him, and without any explanation to my lunch buddies, I stood up and walked out of the cafeteria as fast as I could, stumbling a little along the way. My breathing had quickened, my eyes were flaming fire, my cheeks glowing, and I could feel my will over my telekinesis power fading - which meant I would soon make objects, and possible even people, fly around. So I didn't stop once I was out of the cafeteria, I didn't stop once I was out of the school. I only stopped once I reached my Baby Vixen, got on it and drove away at full speed. I needed some time to calm myself, and it would have to be in private, since I could feel that clearing my mind wouldn't do the job this time.

So I raced toward my new home, on my beloved beauty, contemplating every feeling I had felt during the last hour. As I did that, another quote crossed my mind, though I had no idea why it was _that _quote, or why I was even thinking about it now. It was a quote by Lucretius; he had said: _'We are each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another'_. That sentence always made me laugh, because I was anything but an angel, I was the exact opposite, actually. But it didn't make me laugh this time, this time, I wondered about the meaning of it and why I was thinking of it now, while I was thinking of Edward.

I had always thought that meant there was a soul mate, so to speak, for each human in the world. And that they were only complete when they found each other. I only ever applied it to humans, of course. Creatures such as myself were incapable of such an endearing act as love.

_'Why am I thinking about love? Why am I thinking about Edward? Okay, so he's a mystery waiting to be solved, but why am I so obsessed with him? I don't even know him! Jeez, stupid me!" _I thought as I began to wonder too much about love. Love was not for me, and especially not for me and Edward. I wasn't in love with him, I was just, ugh, I don't know what I was, but in love was one thing I wasn't.

Was I?


	3. Author's Note

_**Author's Note:**_

_Hi, everyone. First of all, I want to apologize for the slow updates. I realize that you are waiting for new chapters and I am dissapointing you all. I just want to assure everyone that none of my stories are on hiatus (especially my beloved Twilight stories, but also the OTH ones and the Charmed one), I just have trouble writing for some. I also want to explain why I haven't been writing much lately._

_I just want to say that I love to write; it's my number one passsion, has been since I was a child. And lately I had been wondering; why? Why do I even write? Why do I do something that's not worth anything to anyone? But I realized I was acting stupid (which is nothing out of the ordinary for me) since it is worth something to someone; it's worth something to the people who follow and read every chapter with dedication for the story I write, which is simply heartwarming. I love all my readers and without you, I wouldn't have gotten anywhere near this far with my writing. So, thank you. You'll never know how much all your support means to me._

_And I do it because I love it, it's as simple as that. I guess I had forgotten that somewhere along the way. I just needed a few reminders. I'll never stop writing and I will finish each story currently on my account._

_My main focus stories right now are:_

_Captivity  
__They'll Never Know  
__Concrete Angel_

_It's not because of the reviews they receive or something; it's just because I have them all worked out in my mind. So those will be updated the most, the rest will have slower updates but I will update them. I promise you. And I don't lie; if I make a promise, I stick to it. No matter how hard it may be sometimes._

_So, until I post again (which will be a story chapter). I hope you forgive me for my slow updates and I will work as hard as possible to update more from now on._


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's note:**_

Hey, all. I know I promised I'd keep updating regularly and not disappear anymore, but there were things I just couldn't walk away from to write a story. My dad got sick, really sick, he almost died. He had to have this massive surgery and it was very touch and go for a while. I've been spending almost all my time with him in the hospital. He's only been home since last tuesday and he still has a lot of health problems we need to be careful off and has 3 nurses a day coming to take care of something still from the surgery. If my dad can get through this next month, through christmas and his birthday (January 1st) okay, then I'm back. If there's another setback, if he dies like they say is still a possibility due to some complications he could have, especially blood clots (he's had them before), then I don't know. I'll let you know at the beginning of January. Again, I'm very sorry, but my family is more important to me than a few stories. I love writing these stories, I do, but they're not the most important things in my life. Sometimes, you gotta set some things aside for more important things, which is what I've been doing these last months. Please bare with me for another couple of weeks, and then I'll let you know the outcome. Then I'll let you know if I'll be back or not.

Lots of love,

Lieselot.


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